TJ, Teej, Theo, Big T, or yes, even Teddy:)

Short version: He's here!! At exactly 40 weeks. 3/4/2016 at 8:57am. 8lbs 6oz 21in.

Here's the long story: (I'm blunt, so reader beware;)

I had been having strong Braxton Hicks contractions for a few days/nights but on friday morning (3/4), I woke up to some so strong that I had to walk through them around 3am. I hung out in the bathroom timing them and prepping for the hospital trip until around 5am when they were closer to 5 minutes apart and so intense that I was throwing up too. I woke up Ben and he gathered his stuff and moved carseats while I woke up my parents so they could be on call for Marley (who woke up during the bustle but cuddled up with Grandpa watching a movie while we made our escape). My dad and Ben were able to give me a blessing to give me strength, TJ good health, and the Dr's good brains - my words, not his;) 

We arrived at the hospital around 7am. They couldn't confirm that my water had broken (hindsight: it was just a bit of watery discharge) and I was only dilated to a 3.5. So they didn't admit me and sent me walking the halls, they'd check me again at 8am. Ben was such an awesome support during this walk - getting me through each and every contraction, one at a time. And he didn't even read any of my "coaching" books! He knew I wanted a natural birth so he was perfect about getting me to focus on just the one contraction when I was convinced I would want the epidural the second they admitted me - if they EVER admitted me - yes, I was feeling very dramatic. But I assumed they were right - that I still had a long way to go and if the pain was already this bad, I wouldn't be able to handle much more. It was finally 8. Ben talked me into one more lap for good measure. And this was not a leisurely walk in the park walk - this was, according to our instructions, a "mall walk" walk. The contractions were so bad at this point that I started feeling like I really couldn't do anymore. (Hindsight: this would have been when I was in the transition phase.) Ben was amazing about supporting me - literally. I'm pretty sure during the peak of each contraction he was holding most off my weight as I had my arms around his neck bearing down. (No, I didn't realize the "bearing down" was a sign I was further along than I  thought I was.)

They checked me again I was only at a 4 and they still couldn't tell if my water broke so they were taking their time admitting me. Well, right after this I was having a pretty severe contraction and started feeling like I needed to poop. I told myself that I'd attempt that after the contraction, but at the peak - my water busted with the slightest push. Ben went to tell the triage nurse who had just left. From there, each contraction - I HAD to push. I laid down and the triage nurse kept telling me to stop pushing and I started panicking because I couldn't. She checked me again, minutes after confirming I was a four and said "your cervix is gone, you're having this baby". (From here on, what truly happened came from Ben. Because I was still in "don't push yet" world trying to breathe away my panic.) 

They gathered our stuff, called ahead, and started wheeling me to delivery. We got there and they kept telling me I had to move to the other bed, I could feel baby's head and I told them so, along with the fact that I could NOT "just roll over". Turns out I could - was just too terrified to move at all. I got on the other bed and was still keeping my legs closed and fighting the push and trying to calmly breath - I thought they still wanted me NOT to push. Then my midwife stood up to look at me in the face, yelled my name and said, "STOP BREATHING AND JUST PUSH!" That got my attention. Out he came after three pushes. 

It was only then that I realized how full that room was. There was my midwife, a backup physician (just in case something went wrong with my oober fast delivery), a pediatrician (apparently there was Meconium in my broken water, so he was there for that), and a bunch of nurses and students (I didn't think about that when signing up for a delivery at a University hospital... my bad). There were between 10-15 people in there. They cut the cord immediately and rushed TJ to the "french fryer" lights to check him out. He wasn't crying and they didn't want to stimulate his crying reflex until they suctioned him out so he wouldn't get any Meconium in his lungs. So we just had to anxiously watch and wait for him to get cleaned up. One nurse in particular was great about staying with me and telling me exactly what they were doing and why. Every parent understands that panic when they don't immediately give you your baby. But he's a champ and all went well. Nothing in his lungs. He's passing all his screenings and tests very well and I'm especially enjoying the heavy newborn sleeps and cuddles.

I could not have done this without Ben. He always questioned my desire for an unmedicated birth. (Why have pain, when there's drugs right? He's right by the way:D) but I love the fact that he jumped on board and is 100% exactly what I need when I need it.

I went into this with such a plan (I didn't even get to turn on my labor and delivery playlist!) When in reality, your body is going to do what it is going to do. I learned so much from this - I can trust my body and mind to do hard things. Even when I don't realize I'm in the very thick of it. I just need to keep stepping one foot in front of the other and I'll get through it. I can only hope to remember this when I'm in the heat of parenting this little man:)

Marley is so sweet with him, constantly wanting to hold him and love him. Which definitely has it's pros and cons.

Marley - Year One ... and a bit of two...

Marley was such good baby in the hospital. It still amazes me how easily they get into a routine. Sleep. Eat. Poop. Sleep. They do exactly what they need to do to survive. And so much of it is so natural. Unfortunately I banked on this whole ‘natural’ thing a bit too much when it came to breastfeeding. I didn’t think it was a difficult thing. I was so concerned about labor, I never thought about how to keep that little human alive after she was here. 

Breastfeeding was tough for us. We found out later (at 18 months) that she has lip-tie, which can impair a babies ability to nurse correctly/efficiently/effectively. It won’t affect her long-term so there’s no use in correcting it but finding that out gave me hope that maybe I’ll be able to have that breastfeeding relationship with a future baby. One can always hope!

Marley in a Nutshell

She hated being completely swaddled. If we wrapped up her arms, she would fight and squirm until she freed them. Then calmly fall immediately asleep. It didn’t take us long to figure that one out.

We were always so careful to lay her down to sleep. I’ve since learned that she will sleep through anything when she’s tired. We have some crazy loud thunder-storms out here in Oklahoma and she has never once woken up to them. I’m not going to pretend like I haven’t woken up and listened intently waiting to pull her into bed with me:)

She was always a great sleeper. (Keep in mind that this is relative – do not expect to ever get a ‘full-night’s sleep’ ever again once you are a parent;) 

Marley started walking the day after her first birthday. On her birthday she was playing at Grandma Page’s where she ‘borrowed’ cousin Kaleb’s walking/pushing toy. She had been taking one or two steps at a time for a few months before then. But I think that pushing toy gave her the confidence she needed to just go for it. After that day, she never looked back:) Except when she’s helping me push the cart at the grocery store. She likes to get down on her knees and watch Momma freak out!

She got her first tooth around 9 months. We never gave her very much pain management stuff for it and she didn’t ever take to teething toys. Just took it like a big girl:)

 

No paci’s for this girl. She sucked on her fingers a handful of times. But her true soother is her bottle. Even at 19 months she still lights up when we say the word. She will only drink from a bottle or mom’s cup (I always use straws, even at home). I’ve tried every type of sippy cup and trainer cup and even given her a cup with a straw of her own. But nope, Momma’s must taste better.

My favorite part of the day is when I get to put Marley down for bedtime. She gets a cup of milk in her bottle and I get to snuggle her brains out and read scriptures until she finishes it. Then we say prayer and change her diaper while singing a song together (maybe have a little tickle-fight) and the tuck her in with her wide array of stuffed animals.

When I’m not working, I get to do this twice! Once for nap time too. That one is actually better because I read to her until she falls asleep. And then I get to snuggle her as long as I want and kiss her, and play with her hair and do all the weird things that moms do:)

She is quite the ticklish little lady; the bottoms of her feet, her rib cage and her thighs. When Ben gets scruffy, he’ll rub his chin on the bottom of her foot and she just loses it.

Marley LOVES the water. For the past 2 summers, we’ve been living in apartments with community pools. There are some great videos and pictures of her swimming and jumping in before she can even count. I love that she has no fear in the water – but because I’m a helicopter mom, there is a lot of anxiety that goes along with that;)

She has started saying “tank ew”, “momma”, “daddy”, and “scoo-er” on a regular basis. She has known the signs for “more”, “milk”, and “food” for a long time so she hasn’t felt the pressure to use new words. But she just started saying “bock-ee” for broccoli so I think she’s starting to branch out:)

When we were living with Marthie she said “Kee” for Kita regularly. She loved walking on Martha’s island and it has been a hard transition for her to be on ground level since then;)

She has always been petite for her age which is one of the reasons why I have a hard time forcing her off the bottle. She doesn’t eat a whole lot anyway and she doesn’t have a lot of baby chub to spare. Plus, who needs that stress? She only uses it right before bed and naps. We practice good hygiene by brushing before bedtime and in the morning (no rotting) and I know it’s common for toddlers to nurse worldwide (no teeth gaps). So I don’t believe that using a bottle a couple times a day to drink nutrient filled milk is going to do long-term damage. I’m positive she’ll outgrow it on her own with more confidence as a result than me traumatically taking it away from her.

She’s got some pretty crazy ‘Stranger Danger’. I joke with the people sitting next to me on our flights that if she started getting fussy or anything that they just need to make eye contact with her and say something. She will immediately shut down. She does great when we’re walking through the store and people are all doing their own thing – she’ll say ‘hi’ and wave and chitter. But when all the attention is on her, she freezes up and just wants to be held by mom or dad. The best way for someone to get her to willingly play with them, would be for them to just get down on the floor (at her level) and play with some toys. She’ll be over in a moment to join in. Just don’t force her – you’ll get nowhere. This aspect of her personality she definitely gets from me. If I could behave like this as an adult I would. Allow me to do my own thing and we’ll become fast friends. Put me on the spot and make me feel uncomfortable? We’re done. It’s amazing how personality inclinations truly do have some genetic connection – I really don’t think she could have learned this behavior from me already.

Happy Birth Day Marley! (Nearly 2 years late...)

Don't worry, this post isn't too graphic (really, it's not graphic at all). I didn't know enough about child birth to know what was going on so it's pretty basic.

Marley was born at 8:30 pm on a Saturday. It was a cloudy day to begin with but I remember seeing sunshine through my window later in the afternoon – it seemed to coincide with when I received my epidural;) 

I had been having contractions for 2 days prior to going into active labor. There are times written all throughout my work notebook documenting the times and lengths of my contractions. I remember while I was training my temp (a new age hippie who helped me prepare for labor more in the 30 minutes she was with me during my contractions than all the birthing classing I could have possibly enrolled in), she could tell I was in the middle of a contraction because my face would go red. She shared her birthing experience with me and while it was beautiful in hindsight – it was downright terrifying hearing it in that moment. My estimated due date was January 28^th. On Friday the 25^th I left work telling people not to expect me on Monday because I was going to have a baby! I didn’t really believe it, but I was so-oooo ready to meet that girl and positive affirmations couldn’t hurt right?

Ben and I went for a good long hike/walk through the back trails of Murray Park with Scooter that night. We hiked up a snow covered hill, well, Ben hiked, I lumbered:) But it felt great to have that crisp cold air coursing through my lungs. I honestly believe that was what got labor going for me. 

The next morning I woke up to a feeling that I had wet the bed. But there really wasn’t anything there and I had gone 2 hours without a contraction (they had been going every 20-40 minutes for that previous 2 days) so I decided I had imagined it and that I was going to go back to sleep and take advantage of the absence of those cursed contractions. Haha, ya right! A first time mom ignoring something that might mean the onset of labor? Fat chance. I stewed on it for about an hour. Then woke up Ben and he recommended that I call the doctor. I stewed on that for about another hour while I casually showered. Little did I know that Ben was packing up our stuff for the hospital. I finally called the doctor 2 hours after my water ‘allegedly’ broke because the contractions had started again. This time closer together and more powerful than I had ever felt before. He said, “It sounds like it’s time. Come on in.”

We had to wait in one of the personal waiting rooms while they ran some tests to make sure it was my water breaking. The contractions had gotten so strong by this point that I was back to throwing up regularly again. After a few hours and a multitude of tests, they admitted me. They started me on Pitocin (I had no idea what this was; I just trusted them to do what they had been trained to do). Shortly thereafter, I asked for the epidural. The anesthesiologist had me sit cross-legged on the bed and wait for a contraction to hit before inserting the needle. This was truly the only terrifying part of my birthing experience. Having to sit cross-legged and hold completely still during a Pitocin induced contraction while a huge needle is stuck in your back that could easily paralyze you with one mistimed twitch. Gah. Terrifying. Afterword’s though, I took advantage of not being able to feel the contractions and enjoyed a nap.

Fortunately the epidural started wearing off and I was able to feel enough pressure that I could kind of tell when to push. Although I still relied on the nurse coaching me since I didn’t really know what I was ‘pushing’. But apparently I was good at it because she made me stop so the doctor would get there in time to deliver the baby. I only pushed for roughly 45 minutes. When she came out, they couldn’t get her to me fast enough. I physically needed her to be near me. I thought I would be grossed out by all the goo, but no. I couldn’t have cared less. She was a whopping 6 lbs 8 oz. of pure perfection.

 

My favorite part about the hospital was when my family got to come in and see her after the birth. There’s a great picture of her sticking her tongue out at Marthie. Cynthia captured the moment perfectly. 

Halloween at the Zoo!

Our first Halloween in OKC, not surrounded by family, was actually a success! We live in a bit of a dodgy part of town, in some shady apartments. So I knew I didn’t necessarily want to trick-or-treat in that area. We love the zoo and they have an event called “Haunt the Zoo” during the whole week of Halloween. So we decided to spend our Halloween night there, rather than traditional trick-or-treating.

Ben had to work a double shift so he was MIA for this holiday.

We carved a pumpkin a few days prior and got our pictures taken so that Ben would feel a part of the festivities. And then Marley and I got to spend a few hours walking the zoo, collecting candy, and even riding the carousel.

It was a lot of fun. I absolutely LOVE our one-on-one time.

Elizabeth Update 2014

I think I got most of this is my “State of Oklahoma” review previously. But I’ll go into a little more detail now. The best thing about my job is that it can be exactly what I make of it. I am a Curriculum Developer for Child Support Services. I work with two specific Trainers and their specialty function area. We develop the concept for training and then I put it all together. I have the opportunity to be as creative as I want and it’s very self-driven. This position has opened up my eyes to what people are dealing with every day when it comes to providing for their children. I am reminded daily of the blessing that Ben is in my life and the work that is required to maintain that relationship. I am also grateful for wonderful parents who have set amazing examples for me so that I knew what to look for in an eternal companion as well as how to find it.

I recently started Coaching for Take Shape for Life again – no big changes there. Just helping people along the path to health:) It truly is a lifestyle change and while I don't subscribe to every aspect of the "program", I have no doubt it has given me the knowledge and tools to make healthier choices for myself and Marley. That girl loves all of my healthy food and eats her fruits and veggies like a champ. I seriously love that.

There’s not really anything else to report. My life consists of wake up, get dressed, (sometimes) wait for Marley to wake up, get her ready and have relaxing story time before the day begins, drop her off at daycare, go to work, miss Marley while at work, go home, see Ben, Scooter, and Marley walking to get the mail, talk about our days/go to the park/make dinner, snuggle with Marley before bed, put Marley to bed, pick up the house, go to sleep and then do it all over again. Yes – my life revolves around Marley. And I’m 100% okay with that;)

Marley Update 2014

Now this one would be fun to write from Marley’s perspective… can you imagine? 

But really, Marley is so much stinking fun! She has started talking like crazy – although virtually none of it is understandable. She is experimenting with her laughs. Lately she’s kind of hooked on this one “fake” laugh. It sounds very guttural and busty. I love it. She does that laugh anytime she sees Scooter.

We are working on her “jump”. Even in the pool, she never jumped in, just kind of fell in. This is one of the reasons we wanted her to be a bunny for Halloween. We’ve been practicing her “jump” and she’s started bending her knees and making the effort – woohoo!

She is an amazing sleeper! I love that she sleeps through the night nearly without fail every night.

She is so good at daycare. She really is like a member of their family. Miss Kelly has told me a number of times how special Marley is to her. Don’t tell anyone but… she said that Marley is her favorite daycare kid (she had to specify “daycare kid,” she has two of her own). I was running late the other day to pick up Marley and she told me that she’d keep Marley forever if she could. This little miss is sweet and oh-so well behaved. And she better be, because she turns all sassy and demanding as soon as I bring her home. But that’s okay, because I also get the snuggles and kissesJ

Oh, her kisses! The BEST! Ya know how some kids go at you with their mouths wide open and goober all over you when you get a kiss? Okay, so I’m not saying those aren’t adorable as ever… but Marley’s kisses are so sweet they just about melt your heart. She always goes for the cheek with little pursed lips and makes the perfect smacking sound. She has always given kisses this way and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Just like every other kid out there right now, she likes Frozen. Which is saying something about how entrenched it is in EVERYTHING because we don’t own it and I have only seen it once – while Marley was napping ironically enough. But she requests that I play the youtube videos of “Let it Go” and “In Summer” constantly. She won’t sit still long enough to watch anything full length which is definitely a double-edged sword. I would love for her to know the characters before DisneyLand and it would be nice to be able to turn on a movie and chill with her (or clean – which is what would really happen). But I do love the fact that she’d rather go for a walk (NOT in the stroller), collect rocks, and throw them into the canal.

Some of my favorite words that she says:

Chips are “pips”

Milk is “nelk”

Anything that you have that she wants is “ah? ah?” (with the mouth wide open)

Thank you is a VERY musical and drawn out “tink ew”

Bless you is “bess ew” (you get blessings for coughs too!)