sleeping through the night? say what?!

I have gotten a lot of questions about my experience with sleep training so I thought I’d just put our whole experience online so I can refer people here instead of trying to convey everything in a facebook comment:)

Marley was always a good sleeper. I remember quite a few times where I had to wake her up after 6-8 hours because I was worried she wasn’t eating often enough.

Although obviously we had a few long nights – but that’s to be expected with a newborn. I had prepared, no, definitely NOT prepared per say, more of… aware? I was aware of the fact that a baby would mess up my sleep schedule and I expected a few years (18?) enduring a constant lack of sleep. So with that expectation in mind – Marley was a phenomenal sleeperJ Generally 6-8 hour stretches.

Then month 5 hit. She started waking up every 2 -3 hours and would NOT go back to bed until she had eaten a FULL bottle. Her milk consumption nearly doubled and I was exclusively pumping so my supply was definitely not keeping up with her. Sidenote and perhaps the topic of another post: This was a whole new kind of stress that I had never experienced – not knowing if you can feed your child is terrifying!!!

Back to the story, I indulged her happily (kay, probly not ‘happily’ but certainly not angrily, maybe more of understandably?) as I thought she was just going through her 6 month growth spurt – she’s always had her growth spurts a bit early. However, nearly a month rolled by of this…

She would get FURIOUS with me if I tried to simply soothe her when she woke up rather than giving her a bottle. Working full-time and being a single parent when home (Ben is working full-time as well – just opposite shifts), was exhausting and I didn’t have the energy to fight her every 2-3 hours, plus she’s petite for her age so I never wanted to withhold food if she really was hungry. So I gave in – more and more bottles, my freezer stash was depleting. More stress, less sleep and a couple bouts of Mastitis and clogged ducts later, something had to be done. I started my research.

There are a couple of different ways you can teach your baby how to sleep through the night. But the learned skill is the same – putting themselves back to sleep without a ‘prop’. The prop can be a paci, being rocked, in our case – a bottle.

baby.center.com has a great article on the different techniques of sleep training. It was fair and called out the pros and cons of each. There are countless other methods but the 2 most common were Ferberizing, commonly referred to as the ‘cry-it-out’ method or a more gradual no-tears approach. Even though we had been doing everything else with Marley with a gradual focus, for some reason I just felt the Ferberizing approach was for us. Which is super weird because of some of the reasons I’ll mention later. I also loved the FAQs on this page. It talks about the CIO (cry-it-out) method and how it’s not as cruel as it sounds. I bought it and I was a staunch advocate against it.

Everything I was reading was saying that 6 month olds should be sleeping 10-12 hours at night and 2-4 hours of naps during the day. Disclaimer: They also recommend speaking with your doctor about doing any kind of sleep training to make sure baby is growing well enough to go that long without food.

I continued my research by reading tons of online forums to get other moms perspectives. As I was doing so, I realized a couple of things:

1) This may not work for Marley. A lot of moms reported that their babies just got more angry and hysterical when left to cry it out. This was definitely Marley. She had a hard time calming herself down. But I knew that I could try something else and I could rule this technique out a lot quicker than some of the slower-paced techniques.

2) I needed an affirmation. I typed up, printed out and posted this oober cheesy affirmation above Marley’s bed. The first night I had it posted on her door so that every time I walked in I would have to read and remain strong. After entering the room that first time, I realized I needed the affirmation right above her bed, not out on the door. It was easy for me plug in my headphones and clean while watching the clock and taking note of her cries in the background. Yes, it was easy to not enter her room as long as I had something else to do. It got HARD when I had to go in and soothe her by NOT picking her up and looking at her bright red eyebrows of fury. I moved the affirmation on my second check-in that night.

We are doing this for Marley as well as ourselves. The self-soothing and coping skills she will learn through this will help her (and us) live happier, healthier lives. She knows that we love her and will do anything for her. We will start by teaching her how to get a restful and peaceful nights’ sleep.

3) I needed to do it on a weekend. I knew I would probably be up most of the night since we didn’t have a baby monitor and my hearing ain’t so bueno. I planned to sleep right outside her door so I’d hear every whimper.

4) We’d probly do okay since her bedtime routine is pretty good – a couple of adjustments to eliminate falling asleep with the bottle but she generally went down initially really well. And in preparation for sleep training, I had already started separating that last bottle from falling asleep.

5) We decided that if she was still crying after 75 minutes, we’d give in. It’s recommended that you come up with a time for obvious reasons – your sanity, baby’s sanity. We’d check in/soothe/love on her at 6 minutes, then 8 minutes, then every 10 minutes after that.

6) We also designated me as the official sleep trainer. It’s recommended that one parent do the initial training so there is no confusion with body language or mixed signals. Once she had a week or so of success, Ben started going in to check on her during her occasional bouts of tears.

I had my plan. I was ready. It started (so I thought) on a Friday afternoon. Marley was ready for her nap but we didn’t have a good naptime transition or plan, nor had we ever. As I was getting ready to rock her to sleep on my chest – this was our pathetic routine for naps – still is as a matter of fact. I thought, ‘Hey, I read somewhere that I need to put her down while she’s sleepy but not asleep. Maybe I should try that now!’

Fail. She cried, hard, for 75 minutes. We hadn’t ever asked her to put herself to sleep in the middle of the day. There was no, ‘it’s naptime’ signal from me. Major FAIL. And a scary precursor for what lay ahead. When I called it at 75 minutes she was so high-strung that she didn’t fall asleep at all the rest of the day. I knew if I tried to put her down like that without a ‘reset sleep’ in would fail again. So I called it off and decided to wait until the next weekend.

However, Saturday was great. She napped so well and ate so well. Ben was home to be a support for me – I knew from Friday’s experience that I was going to be a wreck. It just felt right. She went down, no problem. And I curled up with a pillow and blanket outside her door. Around 2 she woke up. I checked on her 5-6 times over the course of 40 minutes. There were tears – only she never saw mine. But all of a sudden the crying stopped. 

SHE HAD PUT HERSELF BACK TO SLEEP!!!

Again around 5 for only 20-30 minutes this time. And again - SHE HAD PUT HERSELF BACK TO SLEEP!!!

One more night of this with only 1 wake-up and bam – we’ve got a baby who sleeps through the nightJ We even drove to Washington 5 days after her sleep training began and still – only 1 bad night of 5 nights there. Such a stinkin’ good baby!

Some of my favorite things about the fact that she regularly sleeps through the night are:

• I know when she really needs me. Or when she really doesn’t feel well (fortunately we haven’t run into this one yet). Or when she starts teething. I now will know that she’s crying for a reason other than that she needs help going back to sleep. LOVE LOVE LOVE this!!!
• I have some ME time. I can start going running in the mornings again. Before when I had no idea when she would wake up I felt like I needed to be there since Ben got home at 3 in the morning. He needed his sleep so I needed to be around if she woke up between 4-7; which is my prime running time. After 7, when I would go to work, he would have to wake up with her.
• Ben and I can do stuff together:) Fortunately our building is right next to the complex pool and hot tub. Since sleep training, we picked up a baby monitor. Now we can put her to bed (lock up) and sneak away for a swim and some couple time! The monitor reaches and we know she’s safe and sound in her little bedJ We haven’t tried this one yet – supposed to this weekend – but we want to try to go to the drive-in movie theater. We would just do her routine in the car and put her down in her car seat. Hopefully when we move her from car seat to bed at 2 in the morning, it’ll be smooth – ugh, wish us luck!

Obviously I can’t give my brilliant little baby ALL the credit;) So here are some things that we did early on that I think helped ease the transition for Marls.

Establishing a regular routine: I refer to this as though it’s this big ol’ production. But it’s really not. It’s only about 10 minutes long, if that. It’s basically just a couple of things that Ben and I do to send Marley signals that it’s bed time. But we each have our own twist, and it’s never at the EXACT same time so it’s not set in stone. I’m actually hoping to recruit one of my sisters to come to my house one night and put Marley to bed to see how she does with someone other than Mom or Dad leading it. It would be awesome if we could send her on a sleepover sometime and know that she was getting some good sleepJ Again, we never do this at the exact same time. We rely primarily on her cues. I look forward to being able to bump up her bed time to a more ‘normal’ time once Ben gets picked up and we don’t need her to sleep until 9 or 10amJ

At her first eye-rub after 9:15pm, I begin warming up her last bottle. This isn’t technically part of bed time so I feed her out in the living room or on Mom and Dad’s bed. I try to keep things quiet and set the tone for bed time. Now that she’s a successful sleeper, we can still play and be crazy while she’s eating and it doesn’t affect her sleep status.

Depending on how hungry she is, what day of the week it is and what time it is, she also gets a bath. IE, if it’s a Tuesday (or she didn’t get to the pool today and needs some splashing time) and it’s 9:30 and she’s not acting tired OR hungry then I’ll bathe her before food. But if she’s acting crazy hungry and it’s only 9:00, I’ll start with food and then use the bath to postpone bed time a bit so Daddy can get his sleep in the morning too. Again – I love that she’s so adaptable and flexible!!!

After she’s eaten her entire bottle (this is the one feeding I’m a stickler about since she’s not eating again for another 11 or so hours). We walk around to say goodnight to everyone. Giving them a hug, a peck on the cheek and a sweet ‘good night, sleep good, love you’ (when it’s just me and Scooter at home – this is a very short walk:).

Once everyone’s been kissed and hugged and wished a good night, we head to her room. While I put her in a fresh diaper and change her into her pajamas, we sing a couple songs – started with Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, most recently it’s been I’m Leaving on a Jet Plane. Just anything sung with a mellow tune. Lately she’s been joining in with a couple coos and shrieks – super adorable:)

Then we read a little book. It’s rare that she’ll stay on her back and listen to the whole book. I usually jump around or only read the ending or read the first few pages one night and others the next. She’ll start rolling onto her side or holding onto her toes, which means she’s ready to fall asleep.

I’m a very snuggly person with my family so I give her a few minutes of a face nuzzle where I tell her how perfect she is, how much I love her and other sweet nothingsJ She grabs my face and gives me big grins – nearly bringing me to tears each time. Then I turn on her music box that plays Toyland, give her one more goodnight kiss and make the dog crawl out from under Marley’s bed, turn off the lights and close the door.

In 10 minutes – she’s down for the night:)

I plan to incorporate brushing teeth and hair in this soon – but she needs some teeth and hair first.

The other family practice that I know helped her during this sleep training is that I do make sure to respond to her cries and whimpers when I know it’s for a reason. Throughout the day I don’t let her cry for very long at all when she’s hungry or sleepy or anything. She knows I’ll respond – sometimes too quickly. But this will wear off over time. As she gets more confidence through experiencing success – sleeping alone, holding her own bottle, self-feeding, attending day care a few times a week and being tended by family – she’ll become more independent. Though, I won’t lie, I’m not rushing this. I know it’ll come and it’ll come faster than I’m ready for it. So for now, I’m going to take her back when she’s upset because I CAN make it better. I’m going to jump when she snaps because right now what she wants is what I WANT her to want, me:)

playing catch-up

Why does it feel like every time I go to write on this thing, I feel a pang of guilt? It probably has something to do with the fact that I write so sporadically that I don’t capture all the little wonders that make life so great.

I’m not going to say that I’m re-re-re-recommitting to writing more often and regularly because I know that it never seems to work. But I am saying that perhaps I’ll start trying again.  If I have a thought at work, I’ll open up Word, jot it down and add it later. Even if this blog turns into a list of one-liners that at some point meant something to me, that’s better than not keeping a log of anything right?

Right.

So here goes.

I’m pregnant. And I’m happy.

We’ve waited for a long time for the RIGHT time and even though it still never goes according to plan, I think our timing couldn’t have been more perfect. I have a relatively stress free job (finally), I’m surrounded – and more importantly, supported - by family, Peanut is going to have a cousin the same age – CONGRATS KATHRYN! Ben will be done with school so he can be with Peanut as much as I am and be the dad/provider he’s always wanted to be. With that optimistic premise, here’s some of the ugly truth…

Honesty:

For weeks 8-16ish, I was miserable. I didn’t allow myself to post anything on Facebook and I didn’t want to talk to anyone about my pregnancy because I only wanted to whine and cry about it. I was losing weight at an alarming rate and couldn’t keep ANYTHING down. My stomach was relentlessly trying to rip itself out of my body and my whole body was in a constant state of aches. Knowing my level of curiosity, I knew at some point Peanut would be interested in knowing all about its’ childhood. I remember going through mom’s journal and only reading on days that were near or on my birthday or other significant ‘me’ events. I figured a child of mine would do the same selfish thing someday and I didn’t want the only record it could find to be me talking about how this peanut was actually eating me from the inside out and how the first thing I was going to do when I saw it was punch it in the face. I’m sure I’ll feel these emotions multiple times throughout Peanut’s lifeJ

Anyway, now I’m 22 weeks along – HALFWAY THERE!!! And even though I still have to run like mad to the bathroom while holding a trashcan to my mouth on a regular basis, it’s gotten MUCH better. Why am I sharing this now if my intent was to keep this from my child? Well, my intent is not to keep this from my child. Some of my most difficult days were made tolerable by thinking of my conversation with dad where I asked him about mom’s pregnancy patterns. Knowing there’s an end in sight (that’s shorter than 9 months) was sometimes all I needed to know. So Peanut, if you’re a girl, (and future girl peanuts) there is an end in sight. It won’t be the same as mine, or anyone else’s, but mine got manageable around 16 weeks.

I always knew I would share all this ‘not so rosy’ pregnancy information at some point. But my state of mind wasn’t ready to talk tough about it while I was in the moment. Now I can say – the pain is real, you’re not weak and the memory fades. It’s only been about a month, and I’m still dealing with it but you learn to manage it and find the small joys – even if that small joy is that you managed to keep down 300 calories one day. It’s not easy and I can’t even say it’s worth it… yet;) But you learn what your body and brain can handle and you adapt. 

Barfing:

To be totally honest, the past few days I’ve been thinking a lot about throwing up. Yeah, gross huh. But seriously, I’m at the point where I’m grateful for it. I haven’t been to see a doctor since June and I don’t get to see one again until October. I don’t get a lot of variety in my diet and I’m not showing a whole lot – which I know is normal for a 1^st timer – but with all those things on my mind, a woman can start to worry about the health of her child. A friend recently lost her baby at about 11 weeks. She didn’t even know it had happened until she went to a regularly scheduled doctor’s visit. That’s when I got grateful for throwing up. I have no idea how Peanut is developing or growing but I do know this, as long as I’m sick – it’s safe to assume that Peanut’s still wreaking havoc in thereJ

Toughness:

Why do women (in particular) have such a need to appear tough? I’m talking about many of the most important women in my life. Believe me, I know there are some weaklings out there;) I realized a few weeks ago (one of the reasons) why I was so miserable being pregnant. I didn’t feel like I was qualified. I had to go on a chemotherapy anti-nausea pill after I had lost 20 lbs in less than a month. Weren’t women created to be able to handle carrying a child? Why did my body need some special treatment to do what other women have no problem doing? Other people can handle it, why can’t I?

Then I had a really great conversation with my best friend ever, who was going through a similar situation. We talked a lot about the need to feel tough. It was then I realized that it was such a stupid need.  We put on this façade of physical toughness instead of trying to develop the genuine strength that we actually desire. Its’ okay to feel gross sometimes and it’s okay to say so – isn’t recognizing the problem the first step in solving it? Isn’t recognizing the fact that we’ve got some strengthening to do, the motivator to get strengthened up? Obviously there is a balance – nobody likes a whiner. But I’ve seen some close friends do more damage to themselves trying to be tough than being honest about how they’re feeling.

I think I’m gonna go lift some weights now:)

i'm back!

I think the last time I wrote was when Ben and I lived apart for the first time. And now we’re in for round 2 so it sounds about right that I would be updating the blog nowJ  I know everyone is wondering it so I’ll just answer it – No I don’t prefer to live away from my husband. It actually really bites that we’ve found ourselves in this situation for a SECOND time. Argh!  But before I moved back to Utah I knew 2 things,

I hated my job and it was affecting every aspect of my life.

So I made a change.

Sure, I could’ve held out and worked for Target until I Ben started his career – probably less than a year… But I’ve never been a patient, ‘wait for it’ type of person. And with the Peanut that’s coming, I knew I needed a more family friendly career. Ben knew all this plus he had to deal with a wife who came home a hater every night. He was probably relieved when I got this job in UtahJ  So, we moved me back to Utah and Ben will move out here too when he finishes school in December. One month down, three to go!!!

That little fox is our puppy Scooter. She's a 10 month old husky mix. The sweetest, smartest dog you'll ever meet:)

week 27 - a picture of your favorite memory

Another draft I found...

Last week at church someone got up and talked about how difficult marriage was. She preached about how others don't need to hear about your problems, only He does. How even though sometimes you ask yourself "why did I ever marry him?" you have to dig deep to find the answer. I had a hard time concealing my emotions. Was she being serious? Was she really getting up in front of the entire congregation and basically announcing that she was having marital problems? And why was no one else shocked at this situation?

This is how I see it: Imagine a situation wherein you get to pick your co-worker. You can take as long as you want to find the 'perfect' one. You can even test out the relationship by spending a lot of time together before you actually offer them the job. What are some things you want in a co-worker who you will be working with for the rest of your life? Dependability, honesty, humor, agreeableness, conciesousness, communication, the list goes on and on. What will you need from your co-worker so you can be the best you can be? For me, I need (in no particular order) to be able to laugh, be comfortable, be praised, be respected, be cared about, be listened to, be relied on, be involved, be talked to, again - the list goes on and on. Now you want to make sure you will be able to provide for your co-worker what they feel is important as well. So you should definitely have that conversation before the job is offered. Keep in mind, this 'co-worker' is going to be in your life forever.

I'm not saying that finding an eternal companion should be about checklists and selfishness but I certainly am not a believer in the 'follow your heart' mush that is too often portrayed in society (and I'm not just blaming the media). And no, I don't feel that I'm being hypocritical. I know I have the mushy, fairy tale love and I'll tell the world about it. But I think my realistic attitude about marriage has helped me find that.

Dr. Phil actually does have some good insights. One time I heard him say that you're unhappy when your realities don't meet your expectations. And I agree with that. If you expect marriage to be all bliss and honeycombs - when you have your first fight, the first words that come out of your mouth with be, "I didn't sign up for THIS". However if you have realistic expectations - "I love this man. I know we each have opinions and our own minds and we will each use them - that's just another reason why I love him. Sure, we'll have fights but everyone does and if we communicate effectively we will only grow closer from the experience. We have taken the time to get to know each other enough that I know he has the same goals and beliefs about life that anything else I learn about him will only bring us closer." Please keep in mind that these expectations are for both members of the couple. No matter how great one spouse is - it is impossible for one person to give the 200% required to have a successful marriage.

I guess it touched me so much because I'm so lucky to have a man who's stuck with me forever who already knows me so well and is already so stinkin' wise. I don't believe in soul mates but there's no doubt in my mind that we were made for each other.

Although I took a VERY long time to try and decide what my favorite memory was, I finally decided that those kind of favorites also change with time. 5 years ago it would have been when I met my 'BFF' (cheesy - I know) by having a water fight with some crazy girl I hardly knew. 4 years ago it would have been when Ben so eloquently and innocently asked me if we could start dating. 2 years ago it would have been the ridiculous soda throwing fight I had with Ben that made me realize I couldn't live without him. I've had a wonderful life thus far and I know it's only going to get better as Ben and I progress out of our honeymoon phase. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being Ben's only 'girl' - I was actually selfish enough to have a conversation with him where I made it clear that when we have a little girlchild - I still want to be his one and only 'girl'. That's just another testament to how completely unprepared I am to start having children:)

On that note... I actually think my favorite memory as of this moment is when Ben and I visited Fern and Dereck in the hospital where they had just welcomed the newest little addition into their family. Emma Elizabeth Hooley. It was the first time I actually felt natural holding a newborn. Normally I shy away from them - I prefer toddlers that can fall and not break. Ben and I talked about my change in attitude which led into a conversation about family planning. He mentioned that he's always been ready to have a family with me. But he also knows me well enough to know that if he had pushed me AT ALL about having babies before I was ready, I would have gone all Rosie the Riveter on his behind. And who knows where we would have been. Maybe it doesn't sound sweet to anyone else but me, but I love that he knows me well enough to know when to push and when to be patient and let/help me reach conclusions on my own. What a guy... what a guy

blogging away time...

I found a few drafts of blogs I had started, completed but never posted. Better late than never:)

I have a paper to write. It's due tomorrow. But ya know, I'm not really feeling the academic me is ready for it quite yet. So while I wait for her to meander her way to Microsoft Word I'll entertain myself in the world of blogging with no purpose.

What to write about, I could address the ever-incresing problem of world hunder?....or maybe my quick-fix to international peace?....water conservation?....nah. Water... I fell in a pool once....That's it! I'll talk about my summer in Frisco!

Well I have to tell first why I went. But I can't. There was no reason. I heard about it, thought it'd be fun, and signed up. I can't even explain why I didn't try to recruit people I already knew to come with me, or why I wasn't very anxious at all. It was just something that needed to be done. There were bugs in San Francisco and I needed to kill them.

So I went. Home long enough to do my dirties (for non-Page readers: dirties=laundry). Then on my way. I was a big girl, flying on my own.

That's when I started freaking out.

I was on a plane, by myself. I was going to California, by myself. I would be there for 4 months, by myself. I knew no one I would be living with or working with. In case you've missed it, I would be BY MYSELF.

Now that that (I've always wondered about "that that's." How would you be grammatically correct?) fact is clear...that I was completely by myself, I can move on.

The summer began with a scare and ended with a splash. Both of those verbs are literal. Promise.

Let's start with the scare... For those who have never worked in summer sales or pest control, most salesmen prefer to knock doors in the newer developments. Maybe because new home owners are a little more willing to invest in pest control, security systems or whatever you're selling. Whatever the psychology behind it, I was glad. I preferred to service homes that still smelt (smelled?) new. Unfortunately, one of my sales reps decided he served a greater purpose, forget about preventing pests, he was going to rid the world of them. Where to start? At their nest. It was a little neighborhood lined with condo's built so close together, there wasn't room to fit a lawn mower between them. It's pretty common sense that if your neighbor gets pesticides laid down, bugs move next door. So this sales rep only needed to sign up one house and all the other owners came pouring out clammoring for our services (you'll see why this 'pouring out' is a bad omen in a minute). The sales rep left after finalizing a weeks worth of contracts and I was left to do the dirty work.

The first house wasn't so bad. I needed to lay down a couple glue boards to confirm the type of bug we were dealing with and then I sprayed down the interior and exterior of the house. Second house, same deal but saw a few roaches so I added bait to the mix. Third house... bad news. They had a major roach problem. I realized I needed to find the nest (or at least A nest) these nasty things were coming from. So I started checking the water boxes out in their front yards. Fifth house down the street, I pop it open and all I see are disgusting, vile, HUGE cockroaches climbing all over each other. I pull out the only weapon I had - in retrospect, it wasn't very smart... - my backpack pesticide sprayer and I doused those suckers. I can't emphasize this enough,

THIS WAS A BAD IDEA.

Roaches were everywhere. Within seconds they were pouring out of the water box and covering the front lawn. Within minutes, crawling up the walls of houses. Between seconds and minutes... crawling up me. I could feel them crawling up my pants on my bare legs and I kinda lost it. Lost my pants that is. I dropped my pants and ran for the safety of my bug truck. Those were the first pants I lost on the job that summer.

Whew, I'm gonna need a minute to calm down... I HATE roaches.

Now for the splash, this story is a little less intense. And by that I mean I don't get the heebie-jeebies when I tell it. This took place at a gorgeous house, with a gorgeous yard and a gorgeous little family. After making some small talk with the family I went on to start my routine around their house. We always started by dewebbing the eves along the perimeter of the house to get the spiders out to rebuild so they walk through the spray when it's most potent. I like to think I was so incredibly focused on my job that I just didn't see it coming. After taking a quick glance around the backyard I didn't note anything out of the ordinary. My eyes didn't differentiate between the grey of the concrete and the grey of their pool cover...

As I was focusing on getting a particularly stubborn web, I took a few too many steps back, fell on my rump and the 'concrete' started sinking. Extremely confused, I couldn't understand why water was gushing towards me as I was sitting on sinking concrete. Have you ever tried to get out (or off) of a pool cover? Now try it while holding a 15' extendable pole. Yeah, I coulda won America's Funniest Home Video's with this scene. You can imagine the looks I recieved as I calmly rang their doorbell and explained that I would need to come back tomorrow to finish their service as I was clearly sopping wet.

There were certainly more stories that I wish I had documented as they happened, staring a rat dead in the eyes in a creepy old attic, fogging a house, then turning around and seeing the owner stading behind me with no respiratory gear on, the list could go on and on. But these were the two stories that I feel sum up my summer doing pest control.

week 28 - a picture of your night

Better late than never - no?

"Really? We got all this crap for free?"

I think this picture pretty much sums what my first two weeks were like after Ben left for Colorado. Yup, pretty dismal. It was my 2 week ode to the Friends episode where Joey and Chandler get burglarized because Joey ever so smartly locks himself in his 'fine italian crafted' entertainment center.

But don't be feeling sorry for me, I worked. A lot. On second thought. Yes, feel sorry for me:)

an ending of a new beginning...

Honestly, the purpose of this blog is to remind me to document our life. If I can't keep a journal maybe this will suffice:) And the reason why I began the 30 day challenge was to get me back in the habit of blogging away time. This past few weeks I think I could have written some funny (possibly regretted) blogs so now that there is more certainty in my life, I feel as though I can write with a more omnipotent hand.

It all started back in July - Ben had casually mentioned how he wasn't looking forward to the rest of his college experience studying engineering. Let's face it - it's a tough program and the economy wasn't boosting his confidence by throwing internships his way.We didn't really resolve the issue because he didn't really know what else he would want to do with the rest of his life. So a few days later I saw this blurb on MSN that showed the top ten jobs that paid bookoo (sp?) bucks that required minimal (in reference) training. One was an air traffic controller. I had never thought about this before but the minute I read the title - I knew Ben would be great at it. He handles stress like no one I've ever met and he's quick as a cat, mentally and physically - good for directing those planes ya know:) . So I sent him a text asking him about it.

Now he's in Colorado and I'm stuck in Logan until January. BUT here is when the fun begins - Ben and I will each be responding to the 30 day challenge answers on our own. Ever seen that episode of 'King of Queens' where Carrie talks about 'tentpoles'? Even though Ben is not estatic about building 'tentpoles' he has decided to indulge me in this request. Woohoo!